 |
| My mom used to smoked when younger, and this picture from the movie kung fu hustle seems to fit the bill. |
In the tapestry of life, parents often weave lessons into the fabric of our being, and my mother, affectionately known as Ah Toong, was no exception. While my earlier blog delved into the wisdom I gleaned from my father, this narrative aims to unravel the unique lessons embedded in the story of Ah Toong.
Unlike my father, who imparted knowledge through spoken words, Ah Toong's teachings were subtly interwoven into the tapestry of her actions and behaviors. Educated and well-versed, she embarked on her career as a State Enrolled Nurse, demonstrating resilience and resourcefulness that would later become emblematic of her character.
The first distinctive trait I observed in Ah Toong was her unwavering frugality. Despite a modest income and a pension of RM1,045, she managed to accumulate savings nearing RM100,000. Her secret? A savvy approach to market shopping. Ah Toong, a familiar face in the wet market of Taman SPPK, Pasir Puteh, knew that the best deals often emerged after 9 am. By negotiating skillfully and opting for second-grade fresh produce, she maximized the quality of her meals while minimizing expenses.
Her approach to the market was a microcosm of her life philosophy: negotiate, adapt, and don't settle for less. In the dance of supply and demand, Ah Toong recognized the sweet spot after 10 am when sellers were more inclined to accommodate buyers. It was a lesson not just in grocery shopping but a metaphor for navigating life - knowing when to press on, negotiate, and secure what you need.
Nature, according to Ah Toong, held the key to many of life's challenges. Her belief in the healing properties of natural ingredients, particularly those derived from pigs, manifested in her culinary remedies. When faced with ailments or challenges, she concocted dishes like pig's stomach with pepper soup for gastric issues or stewed pork trotters with mushrooms and black fungus for tired legs. However, she coupled these remedies with a stern reminder that no supplement could substitute for diligent effort and hard work.
The third distinctive trait was Ah Toong's belief in divine intervention during exams. In a unique negotiation with a temple deity, she promised offerings of a free-range chicken, American apples, and Sunkist oranges if I achieved stellar results. The ritual involved ingesting blessed ashes dissolved in water. While the results were not entirely as anticipated, this experience instilled a valuable lesson - caution in committing to rewards before the task is completed.
Ah Toong's adaptability was evident during Chinese New Year of 1978. Faced with conflicting advice on the orientation of the praying altar for welcoming the god of prosperity, she decided not to put all her faith in one belief. Instead, she divided the offerings, facing altars in both north-east and north-west directions. This scenario unfolded as a metaphorical lesson in diversification and avoiding overcommitment to a single approach.
Lastly, Ah Toong's refusal to accept defeat even in the minutiae of life revealed a resilient spirit. The episode during Chinese New Year, where she set up altars facing multiple directions, showcased her determination not to succumb to losses easily.
In conclusion, Ah Toong, my mother, was a living book, each page filled with lessons waiting to be learned and absorbed. Her life, a narrative of frugality, reliance on nature, negotiation with the divine, adaptability, and an unwavering spirit, continues to resonate in my journey, offering wisdom that transcends time. Every parent, a living book, imparts lessons that become the chapters of our own stories. What were the lessons from your mom and dad?
